A Ten-Year-Promise

Have you ever felt life like a circle of never ending comparing? Maybe, this is a real phenomenon of application the Einstein’s theorem: Relativity. Every value in life do not have absolute mark, but depend on something else.

Once upon a time I made a promise to a friends. We both had same problems with our selves, with our lifes. We found hard obstacle to pass the graduate school, to make it short: we have difficulties in our own stories. She said we were cursed by bad luck. So no matter how good you are, how smart you are, the cursed that stuck within your DNA like clumsiness, forgetfulness, introvert, low IQ, etc were going to haunt you forever. And there’s some people who blessed with good luck. So no matter what, her/him, his/ her way always easier. Like guided by blessing from above. Luck were so out of our control. An unfair destiny.

She’s not always that pessimistic. That day she just had been upset. I told her, maybe result always out of our control. But effort is not. Luck is out of our control. But faith is not. Sometimes we going to be regarded by our effort, as long as we try, we believe, we thankful. Maybe not now, maybe the next 10 years. And bad luck not always bad at all. Like Donald Duck and Gladstone Gander. Donald is cursed by bad luck, but he have a colorful life. I did not try to be wise that time, I just try to console my own heart. I had been experienced my own disappointment too. I also want to dealt with that. Over my own mourn.

She said to me then, let’s make the try. From 10 years from now, let’s see how would our life would be. How the bad luck girl fate (to compared with the good luck one) would become?

Now, it almost 5 years due to our 10 year limit. We already separate for 3 years. My life is not become steadier, nor tidier from other. But maybe, just maybe, little improved from before. I try not to be ‘competitive’, set my own value and over the criteria. Life is never ending competition. When someone achieve their dream, automatically, not in purpose, I found my self questioning my own self. Envy. I guess that human thing. Somehow you could not control how you feel although you could control how you would react.

Now, that promise more than just to provide a hard evidence for me. That promise were my encouragement. Like something in my mind craving an effort for the real result. Motivation from a good friends who said ‘you should have a better life. You should have a life that you would thankful to. You should thankful for your life now’. That promise is a heal of the bad luck fate. The promise guide my direction. No matter how tough of the competition, how hard the obstacle, how bad the circumstance, I already promising a friend that I’ll make an effort, I fulfilling my promise by try to make the best I can.. And the result? I am as powerless as her to set that..

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